Machiavellian Intelligence: Does Your Child Have Enough?

by guest blogger Patricia Nan Anderson

consultant and trainer at PatriciaNanAnderson.com

Being skilled in the ways of Niccolo Machiavelli, Renaissance authority on ways to seize and retain power, might not be what you think of when you imagine a good role model for your child’s social development. But “Machiavellian Intelligence” is actually essential to kids’ ability to get along in the world… and it develops through game play.

Machiavellian Intelligence refers to skill in understanding others’ perspectives, using this understanding to achieve agreement, creating positive relationships, and developing leadership behaviors. While anthropological research indicates that these skills have been essential to humans throughout history, these are skills that don’t seem to be actively taught to anyone. They just develop on their own. The kicker is these skills develop through children’s shared activities, activities like playing games.

You remember how you played games with the neighborhood kids, don’t you? You and the other kids first agreed on the rules of the game (though usually the game was so much a part of the fabric of your play that you didn’t notice the rules very much). Maybe you added or subtracted rules to fit the circumstances or the players, and you had a way to negotiate disputes.

Think of hide-and-seek, where an older child might have stepped in to coach the youngest player in good places to hide or good places to look for hiders. Think of sandlot ball games, where a “home run” was defined differently depending on how many kids were in the outfield and disputed calls were resolved using “rock-paper-scissors.” Think of Calvinball, where the rules changed in mid-game to advantage either Calvin or Hobbes.

Games with other kids, where the rules are defined by the players (not by adults or a rule book), appear to be the source of Machiavellian Intelligence. Kids need unstructured game play to develop essential social skills. But there is evidence that today’s kids are disadvantaged.

Today’s children have few opportunities for pick-up games in the neighborhood. Their play instead emphasizes both organized sports and video game play – where rules are codified and either adult leaders or the software itself dictates the action. Even casual playground interactions are often mediated by adults.

If your child complains that “there’s nothing to do” when set loose on a playground, she might need more of this, not less. Keep track of your child’s activities this week and see how much time is spent in casual, unstructured play with other kids. Think back to your own play patterns as a kid and remember what you learned in the give-and-take of having a good time with other children.

You do want your child to have plenty of Machiavellian Intelligence but he can’t get it in school or from a book. He gets it by playing games with other kids.

(c) 2011, Patricia Nan Anderson. All Rights Reserved.

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