Keeping Your Kids Safe and Keeping Your Sanity During the Holidays

by guest blogger Kim Estes

helping kids stay safe at Savvy Parents Safe Kids

Ready or not, here they come: The holidays. Along with the holiday season come the relatives and the insane schedules. Even though the holidays are stressful, safety conversations with your child shouldn’t be. However, with recent news reports, parents are concerned and safety is on everyone’s mind. Now is the time to take a moment BEFORE things get too crazy hectic and time becomes too short, to talk to your family and create some common sense safety tips.

Safety while shopping:

• Have a designated spot (a sales counter) to meet older kids if you get separated.

• Younger children should know to look for a “mom with kids” if they get lost

• Have younger kids practice your name and cell phone number

• Remind kids never to leave the store, no matter what!

• Older kids should always take a friend when going to the mall and not leave the premises with anyone

• Kids need to check first with you before going anywhere or accepting gifts

• Never leave children unattended in a vehicle, stores, arcades, or playgrounds

Safety during holiday parties:

• Let your child chose who they wish to show affection to. Do not force them to kiss or hug someone. Kids need to know they have power over their own bodies.

• Check in on kids during large gatherings. Have each adult take 20 minute “shifts” to do a quick walk through the house/yard and check on the kids to make sure that they are doing OK

• Kids should check first with a parent before going off with someone (eg. To play video games in a bedroom or leaving the house to go play)

• If someone is making your child uncomfortable (excessive tickling, hugging, wrestling) intervene on your child’s behalf to end the behavior. Your child needs to know that you will protect them.

Safety conversations with your child will be better received when you keep them short and simple. Never use scare tactics. There will be lots of interaction with family and friends, new experiences and new places. Take time to practice “what if” scenarios with your kids. Taking time to talk safety with your kids will take some of the anxiety out of your holidays.

(c) 2011, Kim Estes. All Rights Reserved.

Views expressed by guest bloggers may not be the views of Washington Parenting Education Network or all of its members. Guest bloggers are wholly responsible for the content of their posts.

Got Mom Vibe?

by guest blogger Kim Estes

helping kids stay safe at Savvy Parents Safe Kids

Mom Vibe--we all have it. It is that instinctual feeling we may get when we are around certain people and places.  Sometimes you get a positive Mom Vibe about something. Other times, not.

Many Moms go happily along with a good Mom Vibe (ohhh, it just felt like the right time to buy that purse!) but sadly the Not So Good Mom Vibes don’t get the same reception. In fact, most adults ignore those inner “uh-oh” feelings they get when faced with an iffy situation. So what should you do when your inner Mom Vibe is sending you red-flags, giving you the heebie-jeebies or just a subtle feeling that something “just is not right”? 

Listen to it.

Law enforcement will tell you, if something does not feel “right” it probably isn’t. Go with that gut feeling!

With hyped up media stories about predators and abductions, parents are left scared and often too afraid to talk to their kids about personal safety.  Parents often don’t know how or when to talk to their kids about personal safety! Yet, one of the easiest personal safety strategies is to listen to your gut, your instinct, your “uh-oh” feeling, your Mom-vibe and to teach your kids how to listen to theirs.

Teaching your kids about personal safety is easier than you think and you don’t have to use scare tactics to do it!

Easy (non-scary) ways to start talking to your family about personal safety:

Help your kids identify their “uh-oh” feeling by talking about it! Just as you might say to your child “You look angry” or “You are so silly today!” you can also label the “Oh-oh” feeling. An example might be “You seemed nervous around that dog today. Did you have the uh-oh feeling about petting it? I know I did.” Helping your kids identify their “oh-oh” feeling and letting them know that other people get the uh-oh feeling too helps them to learn to identify the Uh-Oh feeling and respond to it. Let them know that if they get the Uh-Oh” feeling, they need to find their safe adult and talk about it.

Support them. When a normally chatty and socially outgoing child is suddenly apprehensive and clinging to your leg when they are in the presence of a particular person, do not force them to be affectionate or social. Your child may be picking up on a cue that you are missing.

Advocate for your child.  If your inner Mom Vibe is sending out a warning signal to you, listen to it. If that person sitting at the park, the new camp counselor, or the idea of allowing your child to play at a particular persons house, is suddenly setting off your mom Vibe alarm, pay attention to it. Don’t send your kid off to play at someone’s house or leave them in someone cares if something does not “feel right.”

Listening to your inner mom-vibe is not always convenient, and certainly can be awkward. Learning to listen to your inner Mom-Vibe is important, so don’t ignore it! 

(c) 2011, Kim Estes. All Rights Reserved.

Views expressed by guest bloggers may not be the views of Washington Parenting Education Network or all of its members. Guest bloggers are wholly responsible for the content of their posts. 

Back To School Safety Tips

by guest blogger, Kim Estes

helping kids stay safe at Savvy Parents Safe Kids

 

There is a lot of preparation that goes into back to school season and now is the perfect time to brush up on safety too.
Preschool years: Start talking about the “Uh-oh” feeling. Let kids know that the “icky” feeling they may feel in their tummy is their body’s way of letting them know that something is not right. Encourage them to seek out a safe grown up when they get the uh-oh feeling. Let them know they are the boss of their body!

Elementary school years:

Talk about the roles and responsibilities of the adults around them. Talk about healthy boundaries. Review who their safe grown ups are. Review with your child who is authorized to pick them up from school. Ask them if anyone gives them the “Uh-Oh” feeling. Remind them to “check first” before accepting gifts or rides from anyone (even if they know the person!).

For parents:

Plan ahead on how you want to handle play dates at new friends’ houses. Talk about how you want to handle sleepovers this year. Talk about the readiness of your child if they express and interest in walking home with a friend or if they want to try staying home alone for short periods of time. Thinking ahead and preparing to answer these questions will make you less a target of being put on the spot when your kid asks you.

For all ages:

Remember to make talking about personal safety a fun thing. Never use scare tactics. The more you talk about safety the more your kids learn about listening to their instincts and how to make safe choices.

© 2011, Kim Estes. All Rights Reserved

Views expressed by guest bloggers may not be the views of Washington Parenting Education Network or all of its members. Guest bloggers are wholly responsible for the content of their posts.

Teaching Children About Safety in Today’s World

by Guest Blogger Kim Estes

Helping parents keep kids safe at http://www.savvyparentssafekids.com/

Many of us are currently raising or working with young kids (or both!). Safety is always on our mind. Yet the concept of teaching kids about personal safety can sometimes seem tricky. Yet, it doesn’t have to be! Here are some things you may (or may not) know. Did you know that the concept of “stranger danger” does not work? Kids don’t get it and childcare experts agree, it is not an effective strategy for teaching children personal safety skills.

So how can we teach children about “stranger smarts”? Well, the good news is that I have some simple tools to help you get the conversation rolling and how to keep it going! Personal safety is a life skill and as we all know, life skills are not learned in a day (Potty Training and learning to ride a bike are good examples too).  We all know that just when we think we have gotten our kids to master one skill, the rules change.

Prevention education is the same way. The things that we teach our kids in regard to personal safety at age 2 and 5 will be very different than what we teach them at age 12 and 15. The most important thing is to keep the conversation going throughout their life and help them build a solid foundation to stand on in regard to personal safety strategies. We are here to help you get started.

 When teaching children, especially about personal safety, it is critical to teach them in a calm and non scary manner. Never frighten them. If they are in line at the grocery store talking to a “stranger”, stay with your child, and let them talk. You are there to observe and can stop any inappropriate behavior from the other adult. Your child is just testing his social skills out and let him know it is OK to talk to new people, as long as he has his "safe grown up" with him. Do not get angry with him for “talking to strangers” this only frightens your child. In fact, if your child is ever in need of help, they may indeed have to reach out to a stranger (a mom with kids or a cash register person) to ask for help. This chatty phase often ends but you can use it as a way to start introducing good safety skills.

Have fun with your kids, allow them to meet and interact with new people. A chatty kid is not considered a "good secret keeper" and that might just make them a less likely target for predators... since predators rely on secrets so they can get away with their crimes.

(c) 2011, Kim Estes. All rights reserved.

Views expressed by guest bloggers may not be the views of Washington Parenting Education Network or all of its members. Guest bloggers are wholly responsible for the content of their posts.