Is Your Child A Leader Or A Bully?

by guest blogger Dr. Shirin Sherkat

parenting educator at Create Happy Kids

Do you want to create a leader in your kid, not a bully?

Then make sure that your kids are skilled in:

Coping with change

Asserting themselves

Having empathy

Can your child cope with change?

Coping with change means your kids are learning how to manage stress due to transition, change or crises. Where do they learn such coping skills? From watching you of course.

Allow them to vent.

Give them the words to express their frustration and anger.

Teach them that it is OK to feel angry.Model stress management techniques such as, deep breathing.

Is your child assertive?
It is essential for a child to learn to assert themselves so they can communicate well enough to get their needs met & learn to stand up for their rights.

When you learn to take your kid’s point of view and respect it, you teach your child how to take another’s point of view into consideration.

They learn to respect others’ rights and perspective.

When you give positive feedback and praise for good choices, you teach your child to appreciate other’s behavior as well.

When you empower your kids to make better choices, you create a responsible individual.

Empathy can be taught

Every day you model and set an example for your kids for how to express empathy towards others in need, or respect others’ feelings.Daily routines are full of wonderful, teachable moments to help foster empathy in your kids.

Listen: Allow kids to talk about their feelings, and validate those feelings.Be patient. Be present. And just listen first. Offer validation later.

Label: From a very young ages kids can learn the correct label for body language and facial expressions.For example, you could say, “look sweetie, that little girl feels sad, look at her face.” Or “I can see that you feel scared.”

Model: Through practice, show your kids how different behaviors influence the way others feel.For example, during an outing to the grocery store, you may come across an opportunity to explain, “I saw how that lady felt very frustrated in the store, so I offered to help.

(c) 2012 by Dr. Shirin Sherkat

Views expressed by guest bloggers may not be the views of Washington Parenting Education Network or all of its members. Guest bloggers are wholly responsible for the content of their posts.

What is Kinship Care?

by guest blogger Kristie Lund

Coordinator/Group Facilitator at Relatives As Parents Project

Kinship care is the full time care, nurturing and protection of children by relatives, members of their tribes or clans, godparents, stepparents, or any adult who has a kinship bond with a child. This definition is designed to be inclusive and respectful of cultural values and ties of affection. It allows a child to grow to adulthood in a family environment. (Child Welfare League of America)

Who We Are:

Children

• More than 6.7 million children across the country live in households maintained by grandparents or other relatives.
• More than 4.8 million children live with grandparents, and about 1.9 million with other relatives like aunts or uncles.
• About 2.5 million of these children have no parents present in the home according to Census data analysis conducted by Generations United partners.

Grandparents

• About 2.5 million grandparents who live with their grandchildren report they are responsible for their own grandchildren.
• About 1.8 million of these grandparents are married and about 750,000 were never married, are widowed or divorced.
• About 950,000 of these grandparents are male. About 1.6 million of these grandparents are female.
• About 830,000 of these grandparents are age 60 or older.
• About 950,000 of these grandparents report that they have been responsible for the grandchildren for more than 5 years.

Kinship families are formed for different reasons – parental death, substance abuse, military deployment, incarceration, mental illness. As a result, families are in every area in the country, all income levels, all races, and all ethnicities.

According to the U.S. Census Bureau’s 2009 American Community Survey, an average of 1 in 10 school age children is being raised by a relative. (Generations United)

The following is a quote from my brochure for my support group:

“A relative raising their kin’s children is not a new idea. What is new is the support and information that is available to us. The commitment that we have made is not an easy one. We run into obstacles that the biological parents/foster parents do not face. We have huge emotional ups and downs that few understand. But the good news is we are not alone as we pursue our goals of offering love and guidance to these great kids.”

(c) 2012 by Kristie Lund

Views expressed by guest bloggers may not be the views of Washington Parenting Education Network or all of its members. Guest bloggers are wholly responsible for the content of their posts.